A Widow, or not a Widow

I don’t usually write on political or controversial subjects, but I am so in-sensed by the imminent proposals of the UK government, that I felt I had to write something; but I choose my words with care!

Next Wednesday, 5th March 2014, the Members of the UK Parliament will get to vote on plans to completely remove traditional marriage from English Law. This is following the changes regarding same-sex marriage, that were approved last year despite strong opposition, and come into effect next month. These laws have stood for many hundreds of years, but the plan now is to remove the terms ‘husband’ and ‘wife’ from legislation because they don’t line up with the UK governments new definition of ‘marriage’. This I consider to be a complete waste of time and money, in what I thought was an economically difficult time, when the country is strapped for cash, and we’re all being told to ‘tighten our belts’!
That’s all bad enough, but what infuriates me further, is the fact that they also want to replace the word ‘widow’ with the phrase ‘woman whose deceased spouse was a man’! I was suddenly widowed just over seven years ago, when my husband (a man!) became ill and died within a month, at the age of 51. As you can imagine it was a very traumatic and difficult time for myself and my family. Even now I find it incredibly hard to refer to myself as a widow when asked – it still happens quite frequently – but it is a simple term that everyone understands. How much more difficult it will be to state that ‘I am a woman whose deceased spouse was a man’, each time I am asked! I was barely 50 years old when my husband died, and therefore have the prospect of being ‘a woman whose deceased spouse was a man’ for quite a few years.
On reflection, I think that I would rather be called, and call myself a widow, despite what the government may or may not decide.

Having got my thoughts into order, I think I’ll email my Member of Parliament now, and tell him what I feel.

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